Single Guy From Adelaide

Does this sound like you, or someone you know? Please read on.

WHO AM I?

I'm an outgoing, entertaining, and positive person. I love to make people laugh. My sense of humour might be my best feature, but I know I don't convey it in this profile.

I probably spend too much time in my own head, and it's okay if you're the same. There are so many interesting things to think about, and the world is a fascinating place. I like to talk about things bigger than day-to-day life, rather than engage in gossip about people or local events. It's nice to just spend an afternoon having a conversation with a good friend.

I'm an INTJ, "The Architect". These Myers-Briggs personality types aren't scientifically sound, but people like them.

I'm a very interesting character, but a normal and sensible person where it matters. I'm not secretly some awkward weirdo who no-one wants, or someone who has social problems. I've had more than my fair share of interest from women in my social circles, if that's any gauge. Most of my friends are women.

I'm always busy creating something, or learning something new. My board game design career has been very successful so far, so I'm always working on a new game. That's how I spend a lot of my time. Creating fun for people is a very interesting challenge.

I like big projects. I've recently put a fair bit of time into learning French, and can now speak the language.

I'm a bit of a gardener, but I don't actually have a garden here. I do, however, have twenty different fruit trees on my front balcony. I have peaches and mangoes, and more unusual things like feijoas and loquats, and things no one's ever heard of like abiu, ice cream beans, and Panama berries. It's nice to see them grow, even though it's probably more work than it's worth.

Like everyone, I have downsides. I'm a good person and I try to improve myself, so I don't have any big negatives, or anything I think will unduly impact a relationship. Probably my biggest negative, as people have mentioned it to me, is that I'm very blunt. I just tell people exactly what I think, and that's often not a good thing. Very little impresses me, so I stick with the things I'm comfortable with – people, restaurants, interests, and the like. Don't try to take me to the opera. :) I'm also not at all concerned with tradition or societal norms. I do things no one else tries to do, and I do them until they're complete. This has been my greatest strength, and has made me wildly successful at most things I do. However, it also leads me across all kinds of rocky terrain – like this crazy search you're reading now, that's grown to consume far too much time, money, and reputation. I don't think I'll ever stop trying big projects, and being with me is not going to be a typical life.

What kind of a partner would I be? I don't know. I can only really look at the relationships I have with others. I've sorted out my own world now (with the exception of not having found a partner), and I spend a lot of time helping the people around me. It might just be running Scrabble clubs for people, or something insignificant. But I'm also helping all kinds of people who have very different crises in their lives. There's someone in every family who does that, and that person is me.

WHAT I'M LOOKING FOR

I'd love to have someone who's educated and informed, and very much wants to connect on an intellectual level.

People have told me I should be more specific about what type of woman I'm looking for, but I'm really open to all kinds of personalities. Someone who matches what I'm looking for is more likely to be an introvert. That's fine.

I'm not expecting a supermodel, but I hope people won't mind if I say that I'd like to find someone who's at least average-looking.

I'm not religious. I don't mind what you believe, but I don't think it would be wise for me to try to make things work with a partner who is strongly religious. If you're religious, but your beliefs aren't set in stone, or they're just not an important part of your daily life and thoughts, that would probably be fine. I'll leave this up to you.

EXPERIENCE

Despite my own lack of experience, I realise most people above a certain age have gone beyond holding hands and kissing. I'm just searching for one of the few people who haven't done anything more than that. I'd very much like to have a relationship with someone at the same level as me, in this regard. It's really that simple.

Please make sure you really understand this part. You're welcome to ask, if you have any questions. If not, I'll assume you're on the same page as me, and we can go through this much later on.

I understand that people have had all kinds of different experiences, and have been in all kinds of different circumstances – some very good, some very bad. I'm in no position to judge anyone else. I'm just looking for someone like me, which is very hard to find these days.

AGE

I'm forty-three years old. I've had time to achieve all kinds of things, sort myself out, grow up, and become someone who'll be a much better partner. You would definitely prefer me at this age, than who I was at half this age. Having said this, I'm probably older than you are, and maybe a lot older. That may be fine with you, or it may not. Feel free to talk to me about it if you like. If you're mature for your age, and looking for someone who's mature and stable, I'd be happy to hear from you.

You can be any age, except that I can't consider teenagers. Yes, they do contact me.

MY THOUGHTS ON PARTNERSHIP

Almost everyone I talk to asks to start out as friends. That's a very good approach. I'm not in a hurry, and a great relationship needs to be built upon friendship.

I'm not planning on getting married, but it's not impossible, if it's something a partner wants to do. I'm not in a hurry to have children, but would be happy to, in time.

I don't intend to force a partner to be part of my life and my plans. You can pursue your own career, education, and goals. You don't have to work, so you could also just do whatever it is that you're passionate about.

CONTACTING ME

Send me an email, and say hello. Even better, send me a message on an app. We can just correspond for a while, maybe talk on the phone, and decide whether we're enjoying each other's company. If we really click, I'll invite you to come and visit me in Adelaide. (I'll organise all this.) Adelaide is the capital of South Australia. It's a cultured, modern city of 1.3m, with temperatures ranging from 10° to 30°. It's ranked as one of the most liveable cities in the entire world. I live by myself, in an enormous and beautiful apartment. As I write this, it's a sunny day, and I can see across the gum trees of the Adelaide Park Lands.

Yes, this is probably a long way from where you are now, but there's a whole world out there, and living abroad can do wonders for people. It's easy to stay in touch with people these days, and you can visit home as often as you like.

SAY HELLO

The number of women who have the same level of experience as me, is very small. If you're one of them, you'll have my attention. You're not competing against a horde of other women.

Yes, contacting me is probably outside your comfort zone, but I hope you'll go out on a limb, and contact me. I can't contact you. This applies to everyone, but if you're looking for love, you need to actually take some kind of action. If you just wait for someone appropriate to float by, you might be waiting forever.

I always try to be as generous and flexible as possible, with everyone who wants to engage with me. You're welcome to create a new email account, start your contact anonymously, or contact me on behalf of someone else — whatever suits you.

Some women tell me they took a long time to find the courage to contact me. I imagine there are many women who'd love to contact me, but never do. Unfortunately, a large number of women also contact me, and then get cold feet almost immediately. I go to reply to their message, but they delete it before I can. Or, I reply to a lovely email, but never get a reply. Around half the contacts I get are like this. This is very normal, and understandable. Please remember that if you change your mind too, that's perfectly okay. You're very welcome to contact me again another time. I want to hear from you, and I really don't mind if it takes you a few attempts.

THE SEARCH

Yes, I am an entirely real person, and this is a completely genuine search for love. No, it's not some strange joke, or social experiment. I'm just a guy looking for a partner. As long as this site is here, I'm still looking. I'll very clearly update this page when I find someone, as many people are curious.

You might've seen my ads before. I've been searching for a while, as it's taken me a long time to work out how to convey who I am, and what I'm looking for, to visitors. Initially, I tried to do this site anonymously, but that generated very limited response. Later versions were either not clear enough about what I was looking for, or put people off by being tactless. Response is overwhelmingly (though not completely) positive now, but that didn't used to be the case.

Doing something like this is extremely difficult. Trying to get inside the mind of the reader, and paint a picture of myself for them is not easy. This is the best I can do, and I know it's far from perfect. Please try to remember the person behind all of this, and try to work out what I'm really like.

This search has taken quite a while, but in that time, I've had some great conversations with women, and some very promising contacts that almost worked out.

This search is a long and very difficult process in many ways, but I know there's someone like me out there.

Some woman is going to find love with me. I'm very much looking forward to meeting her. She's out there. All she needs to do is say hello.

THE END

Thanks for reading my site. I hope you've found my search to be interesting. :)

If you think you might be interested in contacting me, you can do so below. If you'd like to know more about me first, please click here, to visit my personal bio. You can also contact me at the end of that site.

If you're just a visitor, please feel free to leave a message on the guestbook below. If you know someone appropriate, please contact me, or send this site to them.